This blog is one of those blogs that will annoy some of you but the topic is annoying me too so feel free to go find something more entertaining to read…and I will completely understand…
When I was young I actually used to read Fairytales with mixed feelings…yep told you…go find something entertaining to read. This one is a NOT riveting stuff. It’s simply a response to being told ‘try not to mention the creator’ but more of that later….Back to the Fairytale…I loved the escape to an unreal world but I would place weird ‘realistic’ expectations on some of the character. For example in the Sleeping Beauty story, I always wondered why the king (or queen) hid all the spinning wheels and needles instead of keeping them around and teaching his daughter how to avoid getting pricked. In the Frozen movie, why would the parents not teach the daughter how to manage her power instead of hiding it? Why do fairytales paint parents as stupid?…whoops that is a question for a different blog…
I recently was invited to speak to a gathering of mothers and daughters at the school my kids attend. The brief was simple: the theme was ‘Fearfully and Wonderfully Made’, a brilliant and easy topic ..a message about value and worth. I was, however given some clarity that this is not necessarily a Christian audience…try not to be too preachy, too Christian. The boundaries for this preacher girl whose foundation and life revolves around the context of my faith and my trust in God, the one who made me that way… was no easy task but it was certainly a privilege I did not take lightly : to speak to young girls and their mums about their worth and then again a week later with the teenage girls.
I followed the brief but it certainly had me stumped. I did my best to sow my heart into the girls who were present knowing anytime I speak on this topic I am sowing the word of God and it will produce fruit regardless of the boundaries and context in which it is spoken. I truth is, the difficulty comes in that to speak about value and worth with out linking it to the creator is a profoundly confusing move. How, can we possibly convince the women in our lives that they are valued, that they are fearfully and wonderfully made without mentioning who it is that made them???
Without a designer, a creator; without giving credit to the incredible artist who put so much of his amazing ness into us, it is hard to articulate that message clearly. How do we believe in our value if we do not believe we were created with creative and intentional thought and that what went into knitting us together was thought through with passion and love and intention. If the world is marketing a message about value but at the same time denying a designer it is no wonder we have a generation mothers craving perfection but a generation of daughters confused. If our kids are taught that we are a product of chance and and our own effort and self making, it is no wonder they believe that we are simply lucky monkeys that won a lottery and we have to make the most of what we have. No wonder our girls feel so empty and worthless and hopeless and imperfect.
I have a daughter who, as a three year old had one main character in her life who told her not just about her worth but about her creator. But now she is 10, the characters in her story and the messenger in her life have multiplied and with them have come messages ..thousands of them. With those messengers and characters has come a capacity and freedom to make her own judgments. How do I, as a mum, convince her of her value? when the world keeps selling a message of her imperfection to drive her to buy or take or do what she isn’t ..they are attempting and sometimes convincing her that perfection is her goal and perfection is possible. My message is counter culture but my prayer is that my message, the message of Christ is one that will bear the fruit of its intentions.
Perfection is not the goal and perfection is never meant to be attainable. If she was enough and had enough and could be enough and could do enough there would be no need for others and there would be no need for God. We all fall short. It is the perfection of our creator to create us short of perfection and still see us as good, wonderful and enough. If perfection was attainable , there would be no need for Christ.
When you realise that the creator was creating her with a craving for perfection that craving is normal but it is a craving that can only be satisfied in combination with others. it is in combination with tosh that we make a whole.
if I am perfect or a product can make me Percy or great marks are what will make me perfect or long blond hair and skinny legs will make me perfect ??I have no need of christ or anyone else. it is my need and my need for jesus and my imprecations that create in my the need for his perfect on and his perfect sacrifice. It is my weakness that makes his strength so necessary and so beneficial.
It is not my husbands perfection that will add worth to my marriage but both of us connected and unified that makes this marriage perfect. If I only bring some of me to the marriage …the marriage is incomplete.
I love that I am the filter and the gatekeeper of my daughters heart and every needle in the kingdom is there to poke and prod her into a poisoned state of unrealistic unattainable and unachievable and non existent reality. It is no wonder we have such low self worth. this sleep like state needs the kiss of heaven to wake us up and teach to navigate the poisonous venom of the enemy. If I am to represent the kingdom of heaven well…I must be diligent in my role. I am here to help her process the poison and protect her heart. I am simply a gatekeeper of the messages she is hearing…TV, magazines, music, books, teachers, friends …the messages come thick and fast but the message is powerful and I know that my role is teach her to guard her heart and let the message …the Word of God have effect…Jesus is enough! He is true perfection…and the spirit of Christ resides in her heart and that what makes her beautiful. My need of him and her need of him is because in him perfect exists and doesn’t have to be achieved, earnt or bought.