My darling husband is facing one of the busiest weeks in his ministry life. His personality is phlegmatic which means that in his natural disposition is one of ease and content. I personally think if you ever want to be anything you should aspire to be that! It is such a peaceful disposition, except when you have to make a lot of decisions you have to move at a rate that demands a lot of you. I love that God has chosen a Phleg to be my husband. He knew what I needed. He knew what our church needed. It also means that as a parent and husband and leader he can’t rely on his natural disposition to get him through. When family life and church life requires strong and constant leadership and decisions have to be made, my gorgeous husband can’t just rely on his personality and sense of humor to carry him through. He has to dig deep in his relationship with God (just how God likes it). As you may well know when someone is under a heap of pressure and life is requiring a lot of them it means we each must bear the load and carry what they can’t. That has been the case for me this week in my role as a parent. I have had to deal with numerous extremely challenging behaviour issues with my kids this week and though in the natural I would expect him to carry it with me I found myself this morning feeling like I was hitting up against a brick wall and getting no-where and yet falling short of what I needed. As a parent I don’t want issues, problems and challenges with my kids. I like to think that somehow they are exempt from humanity and temptation and are the angels God intended them to be but reality is that I feel like I may as well be parenting the Lego on the floor or the dog hair on the mat as their response would be on par. As I headed back to bed with my cuppa to read, as I always do, I read a blog post by Priscilla Shirer that bought an incredible sense of perspective and peace. It helped me remember where it is my help and solutions are going to come from because as much I would like Steve to simply step in and solve it for me this week, that, frustratingly, is not possible …the truth here is as much for me as it is for you…. Priscilla Shirer at http://www.goingbeyond.com/jewelry-box 2 pennies.
That’s all my son had in his pudgy hands when they emerged from his pant pockets. He’d found the shiny copper coins in between the cushions on the sofa and then gleefully stuffed them into his pants for safe-keeping.
So, when we went to the local dollar store later that afternoon, he felt prepared. Problem is, two cents doesn’t buy much of anything these days – even at the dollar store. Gone are the days of tiny candies and trinkets priced 2 for a penny; back when a stamp cost a dime and milk ran you just over a dollar. These days, much more is required. The needs your household demands and the baubles your heart desires each call for deeper pockets then they used to.
But my three year old didn’t have any more than what his little hands now held. The price tag hanging off of the toy he’d laid eyes on was clear: $1.00; a bit more after tax. He’d need at least ninety-eight more cents for it to be able to go home with him.
I saw his disappointment as he looked at the tag and then down into his sweaty palms. The math department in his brain added and subtracted as best it could to make them equal but no amount of arithmetic could do the trick. Soon the reality of his deficit settled into his heart and tears stung his eyes.
You know the feeling of not having enough, don’t you?
. . .enough time
. . .enough energy
. . .enough patience
. . .enough talent
. . .enough passion
. . .enough money
. . .enough skill
We’ve all felt the pain of staring at a task that seemed to require much more then we could ever feel prepared to give.
My heart broke for my son Jude as I watched his countenance fall into a puddle of disappointment that was as deep as it was wide. I wiped a tear from his rosy cheek and squatted down to his level so that we were eye to eye.
He had no reason to cry; no reason to feel insufficient. He might have only had two pennies but those were not the extent of his resources. There was an unseen supply ready and waiting to be dispensed.
I pulled out a dollar bill from my wallet and passed it over to him. His frown reversed its position and swallowed his entire face in a wide smile.
This money was his . . . because he was mine.
You have enough. Hear me loud and clear: YOU HAVE ENOUGH.
To parent your child.
. . .To be successful on your job.
. . .To teach the Bible study.
. . .To be committed to your marriage.
. . .To start the ministry.
. . .To fulfill God’s purpose for your life.
. . .to do exactly what you think you are ill-equipped to handle right now – just like my son Jude did as he sat in a unwarranted hopeless pool of despair on aisle B.
His gloom was unwarranted not because of what was at his disposal . . . but what was at mine. He didn’t have enough in his pocket to secure the toy, but I did. As his mother not only were my resources available but they were ready and waiting to be shared.
Unseen . . . . but available to make up the difference.”